How can I tell if a girl likes me and if she likes me for me?

It seems as if most of the girls I have met ever either only want a guy with big money or flashy things and/or someone who drinks or smokes or... I used to drive a nice car and the ladies seemed to notice me. Now that I haven't driven it in a while, they don't even acknowledge me hardly. Also because I don't drink or smoke, people act as if I am some sort of strange person or something. When I do find someone who seems to notice me they either smoke or drink or has a bunch of kids or something. Now don't get me wrong I am open to some of that. If she drinks occasionally on a social basis, I can work with that. Just not going out all the time to party. Especially if I am never invited. If she either has a small child or has one on the way, I can work with that too. The main reason I prefer no kids to start with is because I don't want to be the next father to walk out on them if it don't work out. It's not the kids fault, so why put them through that. But like I said I am willing to give it a whirl. I have in the past and it was ok until me and her did not get along. Luckily the kids were only a year old so they really don't remember. Another reason is because I would like to have my own kids someday and if they already have kids sometimes they don't want anymore. That wouldn't be fair to me. Not trying to sound selfish but I think I should be allowed the same chance as they had to have my own. But one thing I am not even close to being as open to is smoking. Yuck! I can't stand smoking and it seems almost every girl I come across smokes. Not all but a huge number of them. If they keep it away from me and whatever children may or may not be in the picture and are willing to actually quit not just talk about it, then maybe I'd give her my attention. People say it is so hard to quit and that they have tried but yet I know so many who have just up and quit after many years and no problems. My grandpa quit about a year ago around his 85th birthday and he was smoking most of his life. He just one day decided he didn't want to do it anymore and just quit. Now he just pops a piece of hard candy instead. No worries there, he hasn't had teeth as long as I could remember. lol So anyway sorry for blabbering but any help would be appreciated. Thank you!! Have a great day.